Gen Y - Listen Up!

So, my husband and I were leaving DeVere’s Irish pub as twilight descended. A couple of young business bucks were on the patio tossing down pints. They were using (shall we say) colorful language. One apologized to me and assured him it was no problem (he hasn’t heard me express myself). Then, as we were walking away I heard him remark that his grandmother wouldn’t approve of that vernacular.

Now, I have finally settled into young people asking me if I want the senior discount – but I am far from being a 20-something’s grandmother. I wanted to pummel the little Gen Y troglodyte. It’s very difficult, sometimes, for those of us with more mature judgment to ignore the unintentional slights of youth. And, I am thinking that maybe we shouldn’t!

Baby Boomers are sweeping onto the population charts in record numbers – and we are planning to live longer and better than any generation before us. Perhaps it’s time to exert our well earned authority. Toward that, I should have made that young man wash his mouth with soap – or eat his words. Note to anyone under the age of 40 – don’t presume to guess the age of anyone who looks old enough to be your parent (or grandparent). It’s not polite and puts you in the general classification of “Jerk.”

Furthermore, please don’t call us “honey,” or “sweetie” or “dear.” This is inherently condescending. It implies a superiority you have not lived long enough to claim. It’s women who are most prone to issue this unintended slight although I have had young men (clerks in stores, dudes behind the counter) toss me this empty term of endearment. I am not your sweetie or honey. We’ve never been properly introduced and I think I would find you quite boring if I was forced to have a conversation with you.

As older adults who want to maintain dignity and exercise our rights of elder-hood, I think we owe it to the young to demand a level of respect. For me, this means refusing to tolerate or ignore these small gaffs. How will they know if we don’t inform them? Of course, really nice Baby Boomers will find a gentle, acceptable way to get the message across: “I know you mean well, but I’d rather you didn’t address me that way. It’s inappropriate.” I am striving to be that reasonable. My response? “Listen kid, do you know who I am? I am Georgia O’Keefe, Madam Curie, Elizabeth Stanton, Marian Anderson, Amelia Earhart. I am not your grandma – and if I was, you’d have better manners.”

With our burgeoning older generation I think it’s time to aggressively seek to change the stereotypes about “seniors.” We are not feeble, slow, childlike, dependent or a host of other misconceptions that accompany moving into the second half of life. I’m interested in what other Boomers and our parents would like to see changed about the way we are perceived. Comments welcome!

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